a dedication

this song by "divine comedy" inspired the name and hence the blog itself.

a real masterpiece on the Insignificantly Significant things in life...

the gin-soaked boy

I'm the darkness in the light
I'm the leftness in the right
I'm the rightness in the wrong
I'm the shortness in the long
I'm the goodness in the bad
I'm the saneness in the mad
I'm the sadness in the joy
I'm the gin in the gin-soaked boy

I'm the ghost in the machine
I'm the genius in the gene
I'm the beauty in the beast
I'm the sunset in the east
I'm the ruby in the dust
I'm the trust in the mistrust
I'm the Trojan horse in Troy
I'm the gin in the gin-soaked boy

I'm the tiger's empty cage
I'm the mystery's final page
I'm the stranger's lonely glance
I'm the hero's only chance
I'm the undiscovered land
I'm the single grain of sand
I'm the Christmas morning toy
I'm the gin in the gin-soaked boy

I'm the world you'll never see
I'm the slave you'll never free
I'm the truth you'll never know
I'm the place you'll never go
I'm the sound you'll never hear
I'm the course you'll never steer
I'm the will you'll not destroy
I'm the gin in the gin-soaked boy

I'm the half-truth in the lie
I'm the why not in the why
I'm the last roll of the die
I'm the old school in the tie
I'm the spirit in the sky
I'm the catcher in the rye
I'm the twinkle in her eye
I'm the Jeff Goldblum in "The Fly"

Well... Who am I?

The Buffalo Theory

The "Buffalo Theory" of beer...

A herd of buffalo can move only as fast as the slowest buffalo. When the herd is hunted, it is the slowest and weakest ones at the back that are killed first.

This natural selection is good for the herd as a whole, because the general speed and health of the whole group keeps improving by the regular killing of the weakest members.

In much the same way the human brain can only operate as fast as the slowest brain cells. Excessive intake of alcohol, we all know, kills brain cells, but naturally it attacks the slowest and weakest brain cells first.

In this way regular consumption of beer eliminates the weaker brain cells, making the brain a faster and more efficient machine.

That is why you always feel smarter after a few beers.

Questions that have Confused Mankind

• Who was the first person to look at a cow and say, "I think I'll squeeze these dangly things here, and drink whatever comes out?"

• Who was the first person to say "See that chicken there....I'm gonna eat the next thing that comes out of it's butt."

• Why do toasters always have a setting that burns the toast to a horrible crisp, which no decent human being would eat?

• Why is there a light in the fridge and not in the freezer?

• If Jimmy cracks corn and no one cares, why is there a song about him?

• Can a hearse carrying a corpse drive in the carpool lane?

• If the professor on Gilligan's Island can make a radio out of coconut, why can't he fix a hole in a boat?

• Why do people point to their wrist when asking for the time, but don't point to their crotch when they
  ask where the bathroom is?

• Why does your OB-GYN leave the room when you get undressed if they are going to look up there anyway?

• Why does Goofy stand erect while Pluto remains on all fours? They're both dogs!

• What do you call male ballerinas?

• Can blind people see their dreams? Do they dream??

• If Wile E. Coyote had enough money to buy all that Acme crap,why didn't he just buy dinner?

• If quizzes are quizzical, what are tests?

• If corn oil is made from corn, and vegetable oil is made from vegetables, then what is baby oil made from?

• Isn't Disney World just a people trap operated by a mouse?

• Why do the Alphabet song and Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star have the same tune?

• Do illiterate people get the full effect of Alphabet Soup?

• Why do they call it an asteroid when it's outside the hemisphere, but call it a hemorrhoid when it's in your ass?

• Did you ever notice that when you blow in a dog's face, he gets mad at you, but when you take him on a car ride, he can't wait to stick his head out the window into the wind?

• Does pushing the elevator button more than once make it arrive faster?

"My Murphy's Laws" Series - Part 1

Was just reading something on Murphy's laws... so thought of compiling my personal list of them.. derived from my own experiences of this wierdly beautiful world around me.

Series Part 1: Car / Driving Laws:

1. The later you run, the more is the chance of you hitting a red light.
2. The cleaner you wash your car, the bigger is the dropping that falls on it.
3. The spanner/nut will always fall towards the centre of the car, away from the reach of your hand.
4. The car keys are always in that pocket, the side of which has its hand the most occupied.
5. The more broke you are, the lesser is the fuel in the car.
6. An electric failure will occur exactly when you are talking to the dealer for trading the car.
7. The better you polish the car, bigger will be the scratch to appear on it in the following week.
8. There will be a slower vehicle blocking the very lane you switch to.
9. In all probability, the above said vehicle will be driven by an elderly person or a lady.
10. Whenever you attempt to find a parking slot near your destination, there won’t be any available, and you will have to come back to the farthest one.
11. And, there will always be an empty slot available nearest to your destination, whenever you play safe and park at the farther one.

war... woah!!!

A classy satire of War as projected by deeds of our dear ol Bush-bhai

Please do take the effort of clicking on the thumbnail and reading it...

another one from lincoln

Abraham Lincoln was always prepared to joke about himself-especially when it came to his physical appearance. By the standards of the day, he was indeed considered quite ungainly. He wrote to a friend:

One day . . . I got into a fit of musing in my room and stood resting my elbows on the bureau. Looking into the glass, it struck me what an ugly man I was. The fact grew on me and I made up my mind that I must be the ugliest man in the world. It so maddened me that I resolved, should I ever see an uglier, I would shoot him on sight. Not long after this, Andy [naming a lawyer present] came to town and the first time I saw him I said to myself: "There's the man." I went home, took down my gun, and prowled around the streets waiting for him. He soon came along. "Halt, Andy," said I, pointing the gun at him, "say your prayers, for I am going to shoot you." "Why, Mr. Lincoln, what's the matter? What have I done?" "Well, I made an oath that if I ever saw an uglier man than I am, I'd shoot him on the spot. You are uglier, surely; so make ready to die." "Mr. Lincoln, do you really think that I am uglier than you?" "Yes." "Well, Mr. Lincoln," said Andy deliberately and looking me squarely in the face, "if I am any uglier, fire away."

quotes of power

”There comes a moment when you have to stop revving up the car and shove it into gear.”
- David Mahoney

”Big thinking precedes great achievement”
- Wilfred Peterson


”The price of greatness is responsibility.”
- Winston Churchill


”Eagles don’t flock.”
- Ross Perot


”Beginning is half done.”
- Unknown


"Obstacles are things you see when you take your eyes off your goal."
- E. Joseph Cossman


"Common sense is instinct. Enough of it is genius."
- George Bernard Shaw


Nothing else in the world... not all the armies... is so powerful as an idea whose time has come.
Victor Hugo


The less effort, the faster and more powerful you will be.
Bruce Lee

SMS chat wid God

• God: Hello. You called me.

• I, Me, Myself: Called you? No, who is this?

• God: This is God. I heard your prayers. So I thought I will chat with you.

• IMM: Sure, I pray. Just makes me feel good. Actually, am busy now. In the midst of something, you know.

• God: What are you busy with? Ants are busy, too.

• IMM: Don't know. But I can't find free time. Life has become hectic. It's rush hour all the time.

• God: Sure. Activity gets you busy. But productivity gets you results. Activity consumes time. Productivity frees it.

• IMM: But I still can't figure it out. By the way, I was not expecting YOU to buzz me on instant messaging chat.

• G: Well, I wanted to help you resolve your fight for time by giving you some clarity. I wanted to reach you through the medium you are comfortable with.

• IMM: Tell me, why has life become so complicated?

• G: Stop analyzing life. Just live it. Analysis is what makes it complicated.

• IMM: Why are we then constantly unhappy?

• G: Your today is the tomorrow that you worried about yesterday. You are worrying because the act of worrying has become a habit. That's why you are not happy.

• IMM: But how can we not worry when there is so much uncertainty?

• G: Uncertainty is inevitable, but worrying is optional.

• IMM: But then, there is so much pain due to uncertainty.

• God: Pain is inevitable, but suffering is optional.

• IMM: If suffering is optional, why do good people always suffer?

• God: Diamonds cannot be polished without friction. Gold cannot be purified without fire. Good people go through trials. With that experience their life becomes better, not bitter.

• IMM: You mean to say such experience is useful?

• God: Yes. Experience is a hard teacher, though. She gives the test first and the lessons afterwards.

• IMM: But still, why should we go through such tests? Why can't we be free from problems?

• God: Problems are Purposeful Roadblocks Offering Beneficial Lessons to Enhance Mental Strength. Inner strength comes from struggle and endurance, not when you are free from problems.

• IMM: Frankly in the midst of so many problems, we don't know where we are heading.

• God: If you look outside you will not know where you are heading. Look inside. Looking outside, you dream. Looking inside, you awaken. Eyes provide sight. Heart provides insight.

• I Me Myself: Sometimes I ask, who am I, why am I here? I don't know the answers.

• God: Seek not to find who you are, but to determine who you want to be.

• IMM: Sometimes not succeeding fast seems to hurt more than moving in the right direction.

• God: Success is relative, quantified by others. Satisfaction is absolute, quantified by you. Knowing the road ahead is more satisfying than knowing you rode ahead.

• IMM: Sometimes I ask, who am I, why am I here? I don't know the answers.

• God: Seek not to find who you are, but to determine who you want to be. Stop looking for a purpose as to why you are here. Create it. Life is not a process of discovery but a process of creation.

• IMM: How can I get the best out of life?

• God: Face your past without regret. Handle your present with confidence. Prepare for the future without fear.

• IMM: Sometimes my prayers are not answered.

• God: There are no unanswered prayers. At times the answer is NO.

• IMM: Thank you for this wonderful chat. I'll try to be less fearful.

• God: Keep the faith and drop the fear. Life is a mystery to solve, not a problem to resolve. Life is wonderful if you know how to live.

Ref: TOI - speaking tree